In other words, the stuff here tends to be longer and more convoluted. :/
I thought it'd be a good time to just sit back and reflect on how life has been for the past few weeks, post-dancetitude and post-I-am-about-to-become-a-boring-adult-depression period. I just read through those posts and I always can't help laughing at myself. (I surprise myself with the kind of person I am sometimes)
Because in these past weeks I have come to realise several things about working life. I've debunked several generalisations and assumptions I had about it, and I think I'm beginning to understand how this could possibly work. Let me share them here.
#1: Working life isn't all that bad, when you're in a good working environment, and doing something that you love.
I know every job has a trade-off: if you're earning big bucks, maybe the working hours are long and intense. If you've got a flexible schedule, maybe you're expected to respond to emergency call-backs pretty often.Where I work, the environment is wonderful, people are super nice and helpful (albeit sometimes a bit eccentric and picky, though I understand their rationale for being so), the work is fun because I'm doing design (something I enjoy) and allowed to draw and do other stuff I want to during work hehe, and I'm enjoying it. I guess my trade-off is that the pay isn't fantastic, but hey. It's a first job, I can't possibly have everything, can I? :)
Work isn't dreary at all, I don't drag my feet to work. In fact I look forward to and enjoy coming to work every day. Because every day is spent doing something I love and serving the Lord. There's meaning in my work, and it isn't monotonous or routine. It's dynamic and lively, and I actually find myself enjoying life. It isn't a conventional office job, I guess, that's why I'm able to have so much fun while working lol.
#2: You DO still have time for friends, if you bother to make time and sacrifices for them.
Because I start work later, I end later as well. And yes, it is much more difficult to meet up with friends, especially if we are meeting in school, because my office is in the East-ish side of Singapore, and it takes me awhile to get to school. Sometimes, I don't deny feeling "ohmygosh i'm passing by my house along the way, I just want to go home and save the trouble of travelling and oh it's so late already, by the time I get there people are just going to leave and oh i shouldn't bother, let me just go home, i had a long day at work, they will understand..."But if you feel that the friends you are meeting are worth it, and you can still muster some energy from your reserves, you jolly well GET OVER THAT LAZINESS AND GO FIND THEM. :) Because many of these nuanua "I'm too tired to go out" feelings are self-induced. It's not really that you don't have enough physical energy to go meet up with them, but rather your mental stamina has worn out over the day, and you tell yourself that you are too tired to go out. (which I can sympathise with)
What I find is (and this makes me feel hopeful and energised just thinking about it) that once you meet up with these friends, your energy just comes back immediately, and you find yourself regretting nothing. :) In short, it takes a lot of effort to drag yourself there, but once you're there, you won't regret it.
Also, hanging out at places other than your own workplace/the areas around your workplace can be very refreshing and helps break the monotony of working life. (if that's something that you are suffering from)
#3: I DON'T have to give up dance because I don't have time for it.
I'm still teaching my class at CJ (even though I dropped one during the class reshuffle). :) And even though I might not be able to make it back too punctually for Pat's on Wednesdays, I'm still joining DP (and hopefully EMCC) and I'll keep trying to make it back in time for class before it ends. Heh.It is difficult, and it definitely is tiring and there's always the temptation to rest on the valid excuse that you are simply too tired to dance, and also to spend time travelling to the place that you are supposed to dance. I don't think there's any clear solution to this problem, because I'm sure many working people face this same problem every day. One day you clear it and get over it and go for dance, and the next day the same problem of fatigue and rushing work comes back to haunt you. Like some boss fight that you have to live to fight every working day, haha.
As long as you work, you probably can never get over this problem. I think it's something we've got to learn to overcome and deal with daily. BUT it doesn't mean that we all have to give in and give up something that we love to do a lot (outside of work). Compromises might need to be made and maybe I'll never get to dance as often as I used to do in uni.... But because I get to dance less often I'll make full use of each opportunity and each rehearsal and treasure each of them greatly. I won't drag my feet to dance anymore, I'll look forward to each session and give more of myself at each one. :)
#4: It is possible for working life to take over your whole life, but it is also possible for you to still retain your own life amidst the toil.
Sometimes people don't realise how much of themselves they immerse into working, and get "caught up in their careers". Often we find people saying that they don't have a life anymore once they've started work.I think this isn't necessarily true, though. It's easy to get caught up and lose track of life. But also. When you are working, you treasure the time you have off work to do the things that you really want to do, and if you are motivated enough, you can make them happen once you knock off. Knowing that we have limited time to do things magically makes people more efficient and able to accomplish things faster and more effectively.
I dunno why this happens, but from years of last minute work in uni I have come to realise this fact about us humans. Haha.
#5: After work, I can do what I want to do - guilt free.
Unlike school, where I had to constantly worry about projects and homework and assignments even after lessons end, the nature of my work is such that once I leave the office, I make sure that I finish everything for the day and don't have to carry any leftover baggage back. As such, I can watch all the anime I want, read all the manga I want, dance and choreo all I want, and draw comics all I want without having to feel the nagging feeling that I should be doing work, or working on that final project, or finishing up that assignment left over from the previous week.I make sure I'm productive in the office so that I can leave with no worries. Then I can dedicate myself to fully enjoying the time off and the plans that I've made for the rest of the day/week. This isn't really possible in school because I'm always clearing something leftover from somewhere at some point in time. Either that or there's always some assignment or project, or unfinished piece of something at the back of my mind, even when I'm trying to relax or do something fun/I like.
So now I'm catching up on anime and manga and not feeling guilty about it at all! :D
***
I hope this helps alleviate some of the pre-work anxieties any of you might have. :) Even though I'm aware that many of these points specifically apply only to my line of work/my company, I'm sure that there are working people who can agree with some of the things I have experienced. Still, my thoughts and reflections aren't completely applicable in every job situation. I know friends who are really exhausted every day after work and they suffer a lot at work... I really am very blessed to have this job and this environment, and this is why I wanted to do something I loved as a career. Because I know that I can live life fully and be happy with my life amidst working.
I think there's no better way to cope with working life then to actually do something you love. Whether you grow to love your work, or you chose your job because you love it in the first place, loving and believing in what you do really makes all the difference. ^_^
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